The Cocaine, it is Free

I moved this weekend. And now have no internet. Or cable, for that matter. DAMN I miss having internet. I fucking hate being poor. The only time I really missed cable was when I thought I might have to miss the Desperate Housewives finale.
BUT THEN BRIGHT IDEA # 457 came barreling along. I remembered I had to do laundry. And my new apartment has no laundermat. So I packed my 7 loads of dirty clothes in the back of the car and drove my resourceful ass to the laundermat on Markham, WHERE THERE IS FREE CABLE TO BE HAD BY ALL. So I watched Extreme Makeover Home Edition and then Desperate Housewives, all while my clothes washed and dried. I had to miss Grey's Anatomy. Mainly because I couldn't see hanging out in the joint until 10pm. That neighborhood is not exactly THE SAFEST place to be in pitch dark.

And if your wondering why I was doing my clothes in a laundermat when my old apartment is still inhabited by my loser brother and has a washer/dryer in the basement- THAT WOULD BE BECAUSE HE'S AN ILLITERATE FUCK UP WHO CAN'T FUCKING DO ANYTHING BUT FUCK. UP. All he had to do was transfer the electricity into his name by Friday morning. I even gave him lists in person and by email with names, account numbers and phone numbers OF EVERY UTILITY COMPANY. But no. That was too complicated. My mom and I take the first load of crap over to the new building first thing Friday morning and when we get back - BAM! NO FUCKING ELECTRICITY.

And yes, it was hot as balls outside. And yes, I sweated off said balls in the NINE HOURS OF PHYSICAL LABOR it took to move all of my shit. (Thank you, Brittany. You're the best. Even if your boyfriend was cranky on Saturday. And I will not complain ONCE when I have to help you paint your kitchen cabinets.) But now. NOW. I have my home. My very home non-sharing, wood-floored, courtyard-having, back-porch-sportin APARTMENT THAT WAS DECORATED BY YOURS TRULY AND IF I WANTED TO PUT THE PICTURE ON THAT WALL THEN I FUCKING PUT THE PICTURE ON *THAT* WALL.
And if I want to pee with the door open.
I CAN.
If I want to sleep on my stomach with my half-naked ass in the air
I CAN (because I don't have to worry about weird brother-friends marching through and hence seeing half-naked ass in the air)
If I want to listen to The Cure on repeat for 3 hours
Your're damned right, I CAN.
If I want to lay on my bed in my undewear because I'm hot and sweaty and I spent two hours scrubbing the kitchen floor with bleach,
I CAN
And finally, if I want to cook dinner and not feel obligated to cook you something as well,
I FUCKING CAN.

:)

I'm going to go back to work, because I've taken up precious work time to write but I couldn't stand to be away from the blessed world of the blog friends for ONE SECOND MORE. And now, I shall go have internet-lustfull thoughts of Duckie, because, damn. He's one sexy mo fo in those Blog Ho boxers. Shake that ass.