Friday, May 05, 2006

Al Bundy Was A Douche

Today my good mood is like a delicious Little Debbie Starcrunch® in its ability to outshine any and all Moon Pies® that happen to come my way.  I know the world as a whole doesn’t generally shun the Moon Pies but I file them in the same category as Peeps, only Moon Pies are ranked just slightly above as Peeps are only pseudo-marshmallow substance and colored sugar with weird soul-less black eyes while Moon Pies at least take a stab at deliciousness with the cookie and chocolate part.  It’s just things went sour when they started adding in the pseudo-marshmallow. 

I’m also strangely obsessed with meatloaf now after seeing my boss pull out a blue Tupperware container filled with strangely appealing slices and homemade mashed potatoes.  I’ve never even ingested meatloaf, seeing as how it’s called meatloaf and my religion prohibits me from eating anything that sounds disgusting.  Like radish.  Radish sounds like rash which reminds me of The Herp which makes me think of oozing genital sores. Meatloaf normally makes me think of meat balls which leads to thinking of just balls, (specifically, cow balls) and have you ever seen them? Cow balls?  Like when they’re cooked? If you associated meatloaf with what a boiled cow ball looks like when sliced down the middle then you wouldn’t eat it either.  I also have issues with olive loaf and cole slaw

 

9 comments:

PJ said...

Ha! I find this particularly amusing as I am just now in the process of cooking a meatloaf, which is truly a glorifed burger in the shape of bread.

For the record, mine is made with ground beef, oats, tomato juice salt, pepper, maybe some chopped onion and an egg (NO cow balls thanks).

I have issues with mushrooms. They're smushy and they make me retch.

rob said...

Cole Slaw reminds me of Cole Porter which reminds me of dead composers and I can tell you, from experience, that dead composers can be a little gamey.

Coyote Mike said...

meatloaf can be good, but I wouldn't recommend you making it if you are easily grossed out by touching raw eggs and uncooked hamburger

oakland heidi said...

I often think og the singer...

I had never had meatloaf until I left home for college. My family is veggie-refic and my mom would NEVER ever make meat loaf.

I must admit, although repulsed at first, I am now a fan.

I usually make mine with turkey rather than beef and then I add all sorts of shredded vegetables, to the point that it isn't really "meatloaf" anymore, but because I serve it in slices with mashed potatoes I think its the same thing.

If you like hamburgers, you will like meat loaf.

Faltenin said...

Have you ever suggested that your favorite restaurants just have photos of the dishes? You'd point out and avoid the name associations... :o)

I really wonder what you'd do witth some of our typical British dishes, like Toad in the Hole, or Spotted Dick...

Drunken Chud said...

balls, when sliced open, actually look like brains. it's quite funny the first time you see it and make the connection.

Carl from L.A. said...

I'd eat anything that doesn't kill me - balls, brains, bugs, everything.

Rolligun said...

Oh thank god, I thought you were really going to rank on Al Bundy.

I'm a fan so I'm happy you didn't.

I like radishes too.

It's o.k., we won't have to sit next to each other.

Barry S. said...

You are doing youself a great disservice by avoiding loaved meat foods. Meatloaf is by far one of the best things ever created.